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The lore of no hair theorem states that a (rotating) black hole is characterized by its (spin) mass only, meaning that asymptotically it is point-particle like. We consider the general coupling of a point particle to gravitational fields by studying the fundamental three-point amplitude of massive states and a graviton. Amongst these coupling, we ask what feature single out black holes. Remarkably, the answer is simply ``minimal coupling". We demonstrate how this identification by matching the potential induced by minimally coupled particles and binary blackholes. Furthermore, the simple relation between minimally coupled scalar and spinning particles can be shown to be the "root" of the mysterious observation of Newman and Janis, where they show that a complex deformation of the Schwarzschild solution leads to the Kerr solution.